Not So Wicked Witch Event - Guest Post By Sarina Langer

Ancestor and Deity Offerings Made Easy
 
Not that long ago, I found everything about offerings really confusing. It wasn’t so much what to offer—that seemed easy enough—but how long to leave offerings for and how to dispose of them once their time is up. Naturally, the information I found online was contradictory with different people saying different things. How are you supposed to figure out the right way to make offerings when everyone tells you something else?
Well, fortunately for you, here’s yet another post weighing in on the subject… though hopefully this one will clarify things rather than raise more questions.
What are offerings?
If you’re only familiar with offerings in a church context, where a collection goes around and everyone offers money, don’t worry—deities and ancestors generally don’t care about cash, though exceptions exist. If you’re more comfortable offering a few coins every day/week/month, you can do that, but please don’t feel you have to (especially if money is tight).
To put it simply, you might make an offering to a deity, an ancestor, or another spirit in exchange for a favour. They give you the strength to get through a difficult situation, you share a slice of your favourite cake in return. It’s really no different to when a friend does you a favour and you want to do something nice for them to show your gratitude! You might also compare it to having a job: you work all day and in return, you’re paid. In a way, offerings are a simple exchange.
Having said that, I much prefer to think of them as an exchange between friends, or something you do because you want to without expecting anything in return. It’s okay to make an offering just to make an offering. In fact, I recommend this. We’ve all known someone who only talked to us when they wanted something, and it probably didn’t make any of us feel very valued.
I’ll be the first to admit that I probably lack reverence, but my personal take is that, if you see deity or ancestor work more like a friendship than worship, you’re off to a good start.
Think of offerings as presents. Just as you might give a little gift to a friend to show that you’re thinking of them and appreciate them being in your life, you can make offerings to deities or ancestors (and whatever else feels right to you - if you want to make an offering to Nature in a more general sense, don’t let anyone stop you). That’s really all they are: gifts to show you care.
Offerings don’t need to be expensive, but it’s always good practice to not gift something the recipient hates. If your best friend’s birthday is coming up and you know they’re allergic to flowers, you’re not going to gift them a bouquet. If you’re unsure what the recipient likes, you can’t go wrong going with your instinct. As with all gifts, it’s the thought that counts as long as you mean well. In most cases, you can also do some research to figure it out, but more on that below.
Naturally, you will never find your offerings have disappeared overnight because an ancestor or deity has spirited it away while you slept. Think of them instead of spiritual offerings. The recipient enjoys the essence of your offering. If you leave your ancestor’s favourite fruit on their grave and it’s gone the next day, it’s because a wild animal has sniffed it out and eaten it (with gratitude, I’m sure). Your ancestor probably won’t be angry about this unless they really hated wild animals, and it saves you the question of when and how to remove the offering, too, so it’s not a problem.
Who are offerings for?
Usually (read: in my experience), when witches speak about making offerings, we make them to our deities or our ancestors. However, not all witches work with deities or honour their ancestors, so if that’s not for you, don’t worry.
Maybe you’ve always felt drawn to bodies of water and want to show your love to a nearby river or lake? That’s fine.
Perhaps you’ve always considered nature to be your happy place and want to leave an offering to all of nature in a general sense? No problem.
Maybe you’d like to work with this ancestor or that deity, but you don’t know how to begin? An offering is a lovely start. (It’s also more polite to not start that kind of relationship by saying, ‘Hello, I know we’ve never talked but I need a favour now.’)
Just like offerings can be a nice way to start working with any type of spirit, they can be a nice way to end a relationship. Whatever your reason may be for no longer wanting to work with a deity or an ancestor, making one last offering and showing your gratitude for your time spent together ends it respectfully. Imagine working with someone for however long, and then one day they just disappear on you! No one likes that kind of uncertainty. Nicer to let them know what’s happening and why.
What to offer
But WHAT do you offer? Does it have to be valuable, like money? Does it have to be incense?
Well, that’s entirely up to you.
Making an offering to an ancestor can be the easier place to start, especially if you knew that person when they were alive. For example, if your ancestor loved a glass of whiskey every Friday night, you can offer them a glass of whiskey every Friday night. If your ancestor loved roses, you could offer them freshly cut roses, petals, or even a spray of rose perfume—and it doesn’t matter if they’re shop-bought or home-grown. It doesn’t have to be anything physical, either. If your ancestor loved a particular piece of music, for example, you could play them that song.
Personally, I love making tea for my friends when they come to visit, so my go-to first offering is a cup of tea. For me, it’s easier to get to know someone over a shared cuppa (provided they aren’t a complete stranger and I actually want to get to know them)!
Making an offering to a deity doesn’t have to be difficult, either. You’ve likely got your reasons for wanting to work with that particular deity, so making a related offering is a great start.
If you want to make an offering to a particular deity or an entire pantheon but don’t know where to start, there’s plenty of information online and in books. It’s good practice to research the person/people you’d like to work with at least a little.
You can get creative, too! For example, if you’re thinking about working with a deity related to animals, perhaps you can adopt that animal in their name, volunteer at a shelter, or, if you already have that pet in your life, you could offer their shed fur.
How to leave your offering
This also depends on your preference. Some people have an altar where they can leave their offerings - this works whether you’re working with a deity or an ancestor. Leaving an offering to an ancestor on their grave is also a great option; however, when you’re leaving anything in nature, always make sure it’s biodegradable and not harmful to any animals who might be around.
If you can’t have an altar (or just can’t be bothered - I don’t judge), there’s nothing wrong with subtlety. You can light a candle for a deity, and if someone asks you why you’re burning that candle, you can just say it’s because you like it. (Don’t leave burning candles unattended; that’s a fire risk.) Most people won’t question something as common as this, however. I assure you no deity is going to be offended if you do what you can - as I said above, it’s the thought that counts. An honest offering is always better than one you don’t really care about. (Think gifting a friend something small you put a lot of thought into compared to giving them the first socks you found because you had to give them something.)
When is the offering… done?
This and the adjacent question of ‘… and what do you do with it?’ were my biggest hangups. Using a cup of tea as an offering sounds easy enough, but how long do you leave it out for? An hour? Until you’ve finished your own? Until it’s gone off? And once the offering has served its purpose, what do you do with it? Throw it out? Drink the tea yourself?
These questions are also where I found the bulk of the conflicting information.
Some will tell you that you can safely throw the remains in the bin, others that this is the most disrespectful way to dispose of an offering.
Some will say you must bury offerings, but what if your offering isn’t perishable? Crickets.
Some will tell you it’s best to consume the offering yourself, others that you must never do this because it was meant for someone else, not for you.
There are different schools of thought on this, and the best answer - like so often - is to do what feels right to you.
If you’re not comfortable consuming an offering once it’s done its thing, you can throw it out or maybe bury it if it’s biodegradable. If you have a compost bin or heap, that’s an option (but do your research - not all food is fine to go in the compost).
If you feel that the offering is now done and exhausted, you can throw it out.
Another option is to consume the offering yourself, the thinking being that it is infused with the deity’s or ancestor’s energy, so by consuming it yourself you’re taking some of that energy into yourself. This is what I do, too. I hate wasting food or drink, and I’m not about to wash a perfectly good (if now cold) cup of tea down the drain.
When you’re leaving food, you don’t want it to go off (would you be thrilled to receive rotting food?), so leaving it for a day or even just an hour is perfectly fine. It’s common in some traditions to invite your ancestors or deities to dinner, so cleaning up their plate when you clean up yours makes perfect sense.
The important thing is that you do whatever you decide with respect. You can likely find out what the commonly done thing was for the deity or pantheon you want to follow. It’s fine to adopt the original tradition into your practice, and I would argue that it’s another way of being respectful.
How long to leave the offering for in the first place depends. You can simply leave smaller candles and incense until they’re burnt out. Larger candles you can snuff out and light again another time, and scented candles can be a great way to share a scent you love with your ancestor or your deity - especially if you know your ancestor loved the same scent!
Whatever you decide, you can always thank the offering for its now-ended service when you remove it. That way, you remove it on a physical as well as on a spiritual level. If you make an offering and know you can’t leave it for long, you can clarify this when you leave it.
Don’t overthink it
As with everything, be honest in your approach, be yourself, be genuine, and I’m sure your ancestor or deity will appreciate no matter what you do.
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To learn more about Sarina and her books, visit her website at sarinalanger.com.

About the Author
 
Sarina Langer is a dark fantasy author of both epic and urban paranormal novels from the delightfully cloudy South of England.
She is as obsessed with books and stationery now as she was as a child, when she drowned her box of colour pencils in water so they wouldn’t die and scribbled her first stories on corridor walls. (‘A first sign of things to come’, according to her mother. ‘Normal toddler behaviour’, according to Sarina.)
In her free time, she has a weakness for books, pretty words, and spends what’s probably too much time playing video games.
She believes that the best books are those where every ray of light casts a shadow